YES! “THE END” is finally here! Hold on, when I say that I mean that regarding to the thirteenth and final book of “The Series of Unfortunate Events.” I don’t actually mean ‘the end’ – oooh, let’s not even go there! Anyway, “The End” was released on Friday, October 13, 2006 (woah, that is one scary date, eh?) and I had to get my hands on a copy right away! These novels are superb and well written. Yes, I do admit they are quite depressed and melancholy but hey! It’s not real, so I’m fine with that… I think. Okay, you might be wondering where I’m getting at. Well, I’m here to be that one person who is…is…IS going to briefly recap what the book is about! Am I a heroic person or what? Yes, I am. (NOTE: I will not give away the ending and yes, I can be a bit arrogant at times – only a bit!).
The glum (but great) story starts off with the Baudelaire siblings (the orphaned siblings that the story revolves around) in the same boat as Count Olaf (the menacing villain who thinks he’s ‘all that’ – which he IS NOT!). Now, when I say that they are in the same boat, I don’t solely necessarily mean that they are in the same situation, but they are actually drifting in the middle of an unknown body of water on a tiny boat. Yep, that statement was quite ambiguous. Alas, the whole story can practically be referred to be ambiguous as well.
The siblings and the count were hopelessly lost and were desperately seeking for land. Well, the Baudelaires were working and trying their best to keep the boat moving with spatulas they use for oars. Count Olaf on the other hand was busy peeling off the boat’s original nameplate entitled “Carmelita.” If you do not know who Carmelita is, you don’t want to find out (this wicked little and somewhat adopted daughter of Count Olaf isn’t really that important anyway). The nameplate revealed to be covering another one underneath it, which was entitled “Count Olaf.” This suited Olaf perfectly, for anything named after him is always superb!
With Olaf done prying off the original nameplate with his filthy fingernails, he had the time to look around him again and noticed a storm was coming – and it was. The storm didn’t do much harm but swirled the count and the orphans in eddies and quite ferociously as well. When it all ended, the Baudelaires seemed to have ended up on a nearby island, which had been noticed earlier. Their clothes were terribly wet and clung to their bodies and added to their weight and their level of uncomfort (like wet clothes usually do). The Baudelaires thought that the storm had finally got ridden of Olaf for them… but hey, Olaf washed up on the shore unconscious yet alive. As soon as Olaf’s baleful eyes opened he was overjoyed to see land and earnestly believing that he had discovered what he called “Olaf-land” (and he was to be king, of course).
The Baudelaires knew that they weren’t the first people to arrive on this land, due to the fact a little white figure was scurrying towards them at that instant, and it was surely not an animal – or a ghost. The little figure turned out to be a little girl of six or seven who wore big black sunglasses and was wearing a robe of white with a seashell (which was later found out to be filled with coconut cordial – a very sweet drink that made the Baudelaires dizzy). The little figure (isn’t that a cute way of describing a little figure?) introduced herself as Friday. It must be charming to have a name of a weekday. Although, I guess it’d be awfully confusing at times. Then again, I’m glad with my own name!
Count Olaf told Friday that he was to be the island’s new king. Olaf was really rude towards Friday that she thought he should left alone while she guided the nice Baudelaires to the inner island where the rest of the inhabitants lived. Olaf was actually perceived as the villain right away (which is very rare in this series) and is left alone to wander the island. I actually felt sorry for him, but that only lasted for the tiniest fraction a second (he is a BAD, BAD man after all!).
When the Baudelaires arrived where Friday led them, they discovered many of the awkward traditions that took place here. Some of them were: 1) Only wear white robes 2) The only drink around here is coconut cordial (no fresh water – sucks, doesn’t it?) or 3) Whenever things arrive on shore from the rest of the world, you have to bring them to ISHMAEL and allow him to virtually decide what to do with it (even though he doesn’t really say you must, but in a way, he is saying that). For those of you who are going, “Uh, Thamy, who in the island is ISHMAEL? Is he a big teddy bear?” No, he isn’t a teddy bear. He is actually a human being that is a male. He is the apparent ‘leader’ of the island, since he has been here the longest. Ishmael generated these silly rules and more (such as the one that states that one isn’t allowed to yodel – isn’t that something?).
So, the orphans play along the rules for a while and live safely on the island. Soon enough, Count Olaf comes back (as he always does) and is dressed up as a pregnant female trying to pretend to be Kit Snicket. Kit Snicket (if you’ve read the books, you’d know) is the nice lady who tries to help the Baudelaires and is pregnant. Olaf’s disguise actually does not work and is locked up in an ornate birdcage. You might be thinking that Olaf is finally through – which seems like that. Nevertheless, he convicts an act of pure evil!!! It is terrifying! It is – well, I think I’ll end it off there. What I will tell you is this: a deadly fungus, a bitter apple, one birth, two more confirmed deaths – but it is definitely possible that there were more – and the unlocking of a couple of mysteries (that sadly lead to a couple of more mysteries) are involved in the remainder of the book the thirteenth.
Ahh, when I completed this novel I was quite stimulated. It is definitely the best novel of the lot. Questions have been answered in this novel, yet many have not. This leaves us quite perplexed in life of the Baudelaires and the life of our own. If you franticly want to know the ending of the story, I will tell you. It is… NO WAY! I am not going to tell you (you thought I would, didn’t you?). Well, if you want to find out, you’d have to read the whole novel on your own! Trust me, if you have followed the lives of the orphans, you won’t be disappointed. I’d recommend this gruesome (but always great!) book to anyone over the age of nine – the younger ones might read this book, but it’s at their own expense! I really applaud Lemony Snicket’s expertise in writing skills and I found it written quite well and it had suspense. However, I must say, if you haven’t read the volumes preceding this one, I suggest you start from the beginning and work your way up, my friend! You’d be much less confused and those volumes will make you adapt to the desolation and despair that is an attribute to these novels. “THE END” is absolutely wonderful in a depressing way – but I LOVE IT! Don’t take my word for it; just ask your local librarian or anyone who cares to be asked! Go to ye local bookshop or the library for a copy – YEE HAW! Okay, I’m beginning to scare myself here… I sounded like a bad ad, and a bad cowgirl. Ah, who cares. To all those “A Series of Unfortunate Events’ lovers out there, I recommend you to read this book. Although, I am required to state (from the words of Lemony himself): “If I were you, I would likely drop this book at once, so THE END does not finish you.” Wow, those are wise words…
Okay, I’m here to blab about a good book (which is a good thing, so don’t fret). The book I’m going to “blab” about is called The Heaven Shop, by Deborah Ellis. In this book, you find out how the children of poorer countries spend their life, if they do survive. See, you and I both hate school (except for the fieldtrips!), but in other parts of the world, children really like to go to school (not because of the fieldtrips), but just can’t go.